


Bizarre June Holidays with Jim and Blair

by PattRose



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Humor, Language, M/M, Sexual Humor, Slash, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-16
Updated: 2016-08-16
Packaged: 2018-08-09 03:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7784518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PattRose/pseuds/PattRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are seven little slice of life stories, each with it’s own little summary. </p><p>You have to stick with this set of stories for the last one.  It’s fun, I promise.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bizarre June Holidays with Jim and Blair

Bizarre June Holidays with Jim and Blair  
Summary: There are seven little slice of life stories, each with it’s own little summary.  
Warnings: None to speak of. Unless you count a lot of bad language in the last one.  
Genre: Slash  
Rating: Teen  
Word Count: 3568  
A/N: You have to stick with this set of stories for the last one. It’s fun, I promise.

[ ](http://s71.photobucket.com/user/PattRose1/media/bizarre%20June%20holidays_zpsyovjptqz.jpg.html)

**National Aquarium Month**  
 _Blair asks Jim if he can get an aquarium for the holiday of the month and Jim tells him why he can’t._

“Hey Jim, would you like to know what today is?”

“It’s June 5th, why do you ask?” Jim wondered. 

“Today is National Aquarium Month. So in honor of that, I wondered if you want to go to the pet store with me and pick out an aquarium, fish and everything else we’ll need.”

“We’re not getting any fish, nor are we getting an aquarium,” Jim stated stubbornly. 

“You’re not even going to give me a reason?” Blair asked. 

“First of all, aquariums smell something fierce. Stop right there. It doesn’t matter how often you clean it out, it smells to me. Maybe not to you or any other human being, but to me the smell is horrible. Every time we go in a store that has an aquarium, I about gag.”

“You’ve never mentioned that before,” Blair pointed out. 

Jim frowned. “Every time we have poker over at Megan’s house, I almost puke. She doesn’t keep it clean enough at all.”

“I wish you would have said something before. We’ll try and have things over at our place from now on. I think everyone likes coming anyhow,” Blair assured Jim. 

“Sorry about the aquarium, Blair.”

“No problem, man. I’m just glad I found out before I spent any money on the aquarium and fish. Do you feel like watching the news for a while tonight? I could maybe be talked into making out and a little groping too.” 

“Now, you’re speaking my language, Chief.” Jim took Blair’s hand in his and led him into the living room to sit and watch tv. Jim didn’t really care about the news, he just wanted to make out with Blair. And that’s exactly what they did. 

**National Candy Month**  
_Jim asks Blair to pick him up some Butterfingers for the month because of the holiday and Blair explains to him why he can’t have them every day of the month._

“You mean to tell me that for the entire month, it’s National Candy Month?” Jim asked.

“That’s exactly what I mean, man. Why are you craving some type of candy tonight?” 

“Chief, if I give you twenty dollars, will you run to the grocery store and buy some Butterfingers and we can eat on them all month long.”

“I will buy you one candy bar, but not twenty candy bars,” Blair said. 

Jim stuck his lower lip out and began to pout like a child. 

“Not going to work, man. You are getting one candy bar this month. Do you want one or not?”

“Nah, forget it. It wasn’t that important anyhow.”

“Oh stop pouting. I’ll make you a deal. If you give me a stellar blowjob tonight, I’ll pick up five bars, but you have to share each one with me,” Blair said, wearing a big smile on his face. 

“Deal, do you want it here, in the kitchen or in the bedroom?”

Blair threw back his head and laughed really hard. “I’ll sit on the sofa, so you can kneel down. I love to see you on your knees for me.”

This time it was Jim who laughed. Jim led Blair into the living room and shoved him onto the sofa, and not very gently. “God, I love to suck you.”

“That works out perfectly then because I love to be sucked. It’s nice to know you can be bribed with candy,” Blair admitted. 

“I love you, Blair.”

“I know you do and yes, you’re still getting candy.”

Jim got down to business, sucking away happily, until Blair shouted his completion. Jim licked Blair clean and moved up Blair’s body to kiss him. 

“Oh for crying out loud, stop batting your eyelashes at me. I’ll get your candy as soon as I can.”

“Thanks, Chief.”

“I’m sorry I brought this holiday up. Well, okay not sorry. That was the best blowjob I’ve ever had. I love you, Jim.”

“How much?” Jim asked, laughing. 

“Come on, you can drive me to the store.”

“Sounds like a plan, Chief.” 

**Fight the Filthy Fly Month**  
_Jim explains why he hates fly’s so much. Making this a fantastic holiday for both men._

Jim swatted a fly in the living room and made a happy sound of the man being the bigger winner than the fly. 

Blair came out of the office and said, “You’re noisy as hell tonight. I’m trying to get some work done for the station tonight and all I can hear is you fighting with flies. What’s going on with you tonight?”

“First of all, it was you that left the balcony door open and a ton of flies flew in. I just happened to look at the calendar in the kitchen and saw it was Fight the Filthy Fly Month. “I’m doing a good job already. They are really filthy creatures. Would you like to hear what I can see when I look at a fly?”

Blair sat down next to Jim and said, “Tell me what you see.”

“When I focus on them, I can see them touch dirty things in the house and then go and touch our food. They poop in the food and lay eggs everywhere. It’s disgusting. It’s enough to make a person not want to eat outdoors again. These senses are sometimes wonderful and sometimes a pain in the ass.”

“That is so fucking interesting, Jim. I had no idea that you could see all that. I need to write this down.”

“Oh no you don’t, Darwin. This is just us talking. No tests or anything else you might want to try on me. Let’s relax and swat flies instead.”

“Do we each get a fly swatter?” Blair asked, plopping down on the sofa and kissing Jim at the same time. 

“Of course you get your own fly swatter, but it’s not as nice as mine. You’ll have to save up money for the new one.”

Blair laughed and then kissed Jim soundly. Blair loved these moments in their lives. The ones where one moment they are kissing and the next moment, Jim pulled away and went after the huge fly he saw. Jim was having a good time of it.

 

 **National Gay Pride Month**  
_Jim and Blair invite all of the bullpen gang to Rowdy Ryder’s bar to celebrate gay pride month. Who will come and who won’t?_

“Hey Jim. Was court fun?” Blair teased. 

“It was even more boring than usual. What’s new with you? Please tell me it’s something good.”

“As a matter of fact, I made a decision today and went with it and believe it or not, all of our friends said they would come,” Blair announced. 

“I’m lost already, Chief. Explain.”

“June is National Gay Pride Month so I asked them to meet us at Rowdy Ryder’s bar and join in on the celebration. And they all said yes. We’re going tonight, big man.”

“You asked all of our straight friends to the gay bar we stop in at now and then? What were you thinking?” Jim wondered. 

“Chop, chop. Get ready to go. We’re meeting them at 6:30. They serve food, so I figured we could eat and everything. No better way to celebrate a holiday than to invite good friends to join us.”

Jim leaned down and kissed Blair. “Have I mentioned how much I love you today?”

“Nope, so that will do. I love you too. You don’t seem mad about Rowdy Ryder’s. It’s okay with you?”

“Blair, Simon wouldn’t go anywhere he didn’t want to. And neither would Rafe or Brown. Then again, they might be doing it to be nice. We have good friends, Chief. At least they have wonderful food there. Best hot sandwiches in town.”

“I’m so glad you’re not mad at me,” Blair said, smiling. 

“Nope, I’m going to get ready to go and forget all about my day in court,” Jim called out as he ran up the stairs. 

“Wait a minute, you never said what happened in court that was so awful,” Blair said. 

“I’m forgetting all about the day, Chief. Let’s enjoy tonight and our friends and forget about negative things.”

Blair had followed Jim upstairs and just smiled at him getting dressed. 

“You look damn fine. Maybe I should cancel,” Blair joked. 

“Hell no, I’m checking off as many as the holidays on the calendar that I can celebrate. Happy Gay Pride day, Chief.”

Blair pulled Jim down for a kiss and said, “Hurry up, they are probably already there and getting hit on.”

Jim threw back his head and laughed. 

**National Adopt a Cat Month**  
_Blair asks Jim if they could get a cat for the loft. Jim explains that his spirit animal will have to do because he’s allergic to cats, big time._

They guys were eating breakfast on their day off while reading the paper. 

“Hey Jim, look here… It’s National Adopt a Cat Month at the shelter. They are practically giving them away. Why don’t we go down and adopt one. I’ve always wanted a cat. I never could when I was young because we moved around too much. I had to make due with playing with other people’s cats. What do you say?” 

Jim frowned and answered, “Blair, I’m really allergic to cats. Their hair or something. My eyes swell up and before long I can’t breathe properly. I’m really sorry for ruining your dream.”

“How about a guinea pig?” Blair asked hopefully. 

“Still allergic. And they smell pretty badly. I say we have a pet free house and I can sleep at night. My spirit animal and yours will have to be good enough.”

“But Jim, I know I’ve seen you around dogs before,” Blair pointed out. 

“Dog’s bother me a little bit, but not as much as cats. Now, could we change the subject?

“Okay, pet free house it is. Let’s go upstairs and I’ll pet you like my very own pet? Blair asked. 

Jim laughed and pulled Blair up and they both walked up the stairs. Now, Blair was talking. 

 

**National Fresh Fruit and Vegetables Month**  
_Jim takes Blair to a special place to buy fruit and vegetables because after all it’s a monthly holiday._

After work Jim asked Blair, “How would you like to go somewhere special? I just found a new place and thought of you when I saw it.”

“Why were you checking out new places without me?” Blair asked. 

“I wasn’t. I meant, I drove by it and thought of you. But I need to get something there and wanted you to go along with me.”

Blair smiled. “In that case, it’s a date. Can I guess where we’re going?”

“No… You have to be patient and wait and see.”

“Okay…What are we having for dinner tonight?”

“It’s a surprise, Chief.”

“Oh man, you’re taking me to a new grocery store?” Blair looked somewhat disappointed. 

“Not hardly. This place just opened last week. And it’s not a grocery store.”

Blair looked happy once again. “Why can’t you just tell me?”

“Because I love to see you chomping at the bit,” Jim kidded. 

Jim drove into a huge lot and parked and Blair looked around. “A fruit and vegetable store?”

“Not just any! All organic, fresh and they let you taste before you buy,” Jim explained. 

Blair kissed him sweetly and asked, “Where in the world did you hear about this?”

“When I was in court I heard two people that were waiting, talking about how they were opening up the store this week. I asked them questions and they answered them all. It just sounded like a place that was calling out for us to stop by.”

“What brought this on, man?” Blair was bouncing all the way into the store.

“It’s National Fresh Fruit and Vegetable Month, and I knew we had to celebrate it and see if they were as good as they promise to be,” Jim said. 

“Let’s get in there and check them out,” Blair said, happily. 

Two hours later, they walked out with four sacks of vegetables and fruits. 

“What are we going to do with all of this, Jim?”

“I thought we could make some desserts for work, give some of it to our neighbors and just live it up for a couple of weeks, Chief.”

“Sounds good to me. We’ll start baking something tonight.” Blair was already into thinking mode about what they could make for desserts. 

“Did you like your surprise, Chief?”

“I loved my surprise. And we’re going there from now on. I’m going to wash all the fresh vegetables and freeze them up for meals. I’m having a blast, Jim. Thank you.”

“You are most welcome.” Jim leaned over at the stop light and kissed his partner. 

“You’re in charge of baking dessert tonight out of peaches and apples. I’m in charge of washing, cleaning and freezing all the vegetables.”

“Deal…”

 

 **Rose Month**  
_Blair get Roses from a secret admirer and knows it’s Jim because Jim isn’t acting jealous about him getting roses at work from a stranger._

Blair was sitting at his desk in the bullpen, typing away when a man walked up and asked, “Blair Sandburg?”

Blair looked up and saw a delivery man carrying a huge bouquet of roses in a gorgeous vase. “Yes, I’m Blair Sandburg.”

“I just need you to sign for these,” the man said. 

Blair signed and everyone was making stupid sounds that didn’t know about him and Jim. Blair knew they were from his lover because he hadn’t even looked up from his desk. He would be getting all jealous if they were from someone else. Blair opened the card and read what it said. 

_Blair,_

_I don’t tell you often enough how much you mean to me. So today is National Roses Month and I thought what better way of showing you how much I love you then to tell you at work. We’re out. All of the guys and women in the bullpen knew the roses were coming. We are officially ‘Out’._

_I love you so much and can’t wait to show you later._

_Love, Jim_

Blair had tears in his eyes when he looked up and saw everyone watching Jim and him. Blair walked over to Jim’s desk and asked, “Can I at least hug you?”

“I don’t see why not. Come and get it, Chief.”

“Later, man, later.” 

And both men knew after the hug there would be much more at home. 

**National Turkey Lovers Month**  
_Blair has to go out and feed the turkeys at a friend’s house that lives on a farm. Jim goes along but isn’t happy once he hears that it’s turkey’s they are feeding. Jim explains why he doesn’t like them._

“Hey Jim, I have to go out to Dave’s farm and feed his animals really quick. Would you like to go along with me?”

“Sure, it’ll be good to get out of the house. It’s been a slow day for us, hasn’t it?”

“You call this morning, slow?” Blair asked wiggling his eyebrows up and down, watching Jim blush. Blair loved when he embarrassed Jim. 

“I meant after this morning and you know it, Blair.”

Blair laughed and said, “Come on, I’ll drive.”

Jim looked horrified and asked, “Are you still tormenting me?”

“Why yes, I am. Come on, I’ll show you the way to go, man.”

They drove until they got to mile marker 97 and Blair told him to turn right. As Jim turned he saw the sign and sighed. It said, ‘Dave’s Turkey’s’ and Jim wasn’t pleased at all. 

“Chief, why didn’t you tell me it was turkeys?”

“Why would it matter, Jim? I just have to feed them really fast and I’m making a hundred bucks for doing it.”

“I hope you don’t like that shirt very much,” Jim said, casually. 

“What are you talking about? I love this shirt. You gave it to me.”

“Then you had better get some clothes from the bag we have in the back of the truck. Turkeys are mean son-of-a-bitches, I promise you that much.”

“Look how sweet they look all lined up to see if we’re here to feed them or not.”

“They trying to figure out how to get you. Don’t let these little fuckers and big fuckers fool you. They are fucking mean.”

“Jim Ellison, I swear you’re making this up. I think you’re afraid of turkeys.”

“Damned straight… I had to feed some with a friend of mine once and they even climbed the trees and jumped on our heads as we walked below them.”

Blair burst out laughing and said, “Stop it right now. You’re making fun of these innocent little creatures. Dave has been doing this for years. He would have mentioned if they were vicious.”

“Blair, why did you decide to do this?” Jim asked. 

Blair looked embarrassed. “It’s National Turkey Lovers Month. And they don’t mean to kill them, they mean to take care of them and feed them. Dave told me the feed is in the barn. Come on, it won’t be bad at all.”

Jim looked over and saw two of the turkeys climbing the tree and he just smiled to himself. Blair was going to shit his pants when those turkeys came out of the tree.

Blair had one big bucket of feed and Jim had the other. Jim was staying clear of the tree, because he knew what was coming. Four of five turkeys came up behind Jim and started pecking him on the back of his legs. 

“Ow, you little fuckers.”

Blair was laughing as he threw the first handful of feed. And he was immediately attacked by the two turkeys in the tree. Jim looked over and saw blood on Blair’s face and was instantly pissed off. 

He rushed over and got the meanest one off Blair’s shoulders and threw him to the ground. Blair said, “Holy shit, Jim, they came out of the tree.”

“I told you, Chief. I wouldn’t make this shit up.”

Jim and Blair were being pecked to death by all of them trying to get their dinner. Jim tossed a bunch of feed into the spot behind them and they started running for the truck. Neither of them knew how horrible it was going to be. Both men had holes in their jeans and their shirts. 

They closed the gate and rushed to the pickup. They jumped in and started to laugh. 

“I thought you were making that shit up, Jim. I’m sorry, man. Look at your pants…”

Jim looked down and could see the holes and the blood, also. “I hate turkeys. That’s why I never minded cooking them for holidays.”

“I’m with you on that one, babe.”

They headed back into town and Blair said, “I’ve got to get a hold of Dave and tell him that we didn’t finish.”

“Fuck, Dave.” 

“Really nice, Jim. I wonder why he doesn’t complain about them, ever.”

“He’s probably been jumped on top of his head one time too many and he’s got brain damage.”

Blair burst out laughing. “Let’s go home and have a hot shower and put some meds on our legs and arms. Man, those things jump high. And since when can they climb a tree?”

“Blair, they can fly short flight plans. Like from a tree to your head,” Jim burst out laughing again. 

“Well, I was going to rub you down with lotion after our shower, but not you can do it yourself.”

“Sorry, Chief. I was just kidding.”

“So was I. Fuck, my heart is still racing like crazy.”

“I totally understand that, Blair.”

Jim pulled into the parking lot of the loft, parked and they got out of the truck. As they were walking to the building, a damn turkey started pecking Jim’s leg. 

“Fucking thing hitched a ride with us. Hurry up. We’ll call animal control and they can deal with it.”

They both ran to the building with the damn turkey chasing them the entire way. 

They got upstairs and called animal control and told them about the turkey. They said they would be right out. 

Once they drove up to the building, Jim and Blair jumped in the shower and Jim said, “I can hear that fucker chasing the animal control guy all over the parking lot. I hope none of our neighbors get pecked.”

This started a whole new round of laughter. They scrubbed each other down and then rubbed medicine on their little wounds. 

They sat down on the sofa and Jim said, “They’re still chasing it. I swear it’s calling out my name as it runs by the building.”

Blair laughed and then kissed Jim. When he pulled away he asked, “Why would they have a National Turkey Lovers Month when they are so mean?”

“Let’s stop thinking about the turkey. Let’s get back to the kissing,” Jim suggested and Blair was only too happy to oblige.


End file.
